February 6, 2012
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Letter to Myself
Dear Stupid Fool,
I've been watching you for a long time and I've seen you dealing with people, problems, and grappling with your own hopes and dreams, and I just can't take it anymore. Grow up. Listen to your mother and stop believing. Fairy tales are for princesses, and you are not a princess. You are a pathetic penny whose face value is more than its worth. You're not even a lucky penny. You're the opposite, so stop pretending, stop hoping, and just grow up. Nobody cares what you want. Why should they? They've got their own wants, and you're not one of them.
Oh, you feel sad? The best thing you can do for yourself when you're sad is to laugh at yourself. Nobody will comfort you. They'd rather sleep, rather go on a run, rather move to the other side of the world, rather do anything than be with you. You are alone and you will always be alone. Haven't you laid your innards out for long enough? Has anyone made an offer or displayed any interest? Nope. Collect your belongings off the street and move on. Nobody wants you.
Since you're so pathetic, let me give you some advice. If you want to be happy, follow my directions step by step. 1) Collect your frilly compassion and optimism. 2) Sit them down in a pile. 3) Ridicule them. Jeer at them. Spit at them until there is no dignity left in these qualities. 4) Leave and never turn back.
Foolish girl, this is the way of the world. Dreaming at the stars won't change that. Poetry won't change that. Love won't change that.
Sincerely,
the other stupid fool
Comments (4)
very harsh on yourself.
@rilthe - and yet there are so many who think the very same way; says more about the state of society than one individual.
Even in your self-hate and self-loathing you've still got the power and punch of a poet with your words. Which is why you wrote this, at least partially. No, I can't say I know you, but I know the way my own madness works, and I never do anything without some kind of reason, or without trying to boost my ego even a little bit -- sometimes tearing one's self down makes room for building something new, and that's the most optimistic thing I've ever said; I'm sorry.
I guess if writing a letter to yourself helps you,write another one?
Harsh as you might be, the reality truly is that no one else would or could love you anytime, anywhere. At best, your lover would still have their own ideas, ambitions, they simply cannot be there for you all the time.
Life is hard, the journey usually isn't by yourself though
We just gotta be strong when it comes down to the rare times where we have to go at it alone, that's all.
There, quit spitting at yourself now, that's gross!
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