May 1, 2012

• Me @ Now

  Once upon a time,
  I though I saw a haze on the world,
  but it’s just my eyes.
  Lighter than the pupil’s deep,
  but darker than the light,
  sight is so hard to see, hard to feel,
  hard to tell.
  Where is the world I live in? I can’t find it.

  Clump by clump,
  I’ve torn out my hair
  and balded, good.
  I will make the outside match the inside.
  Vanity and greed are bare,
  and I am balding.

  My character is morphing
  ino the wrong story.
  Fairy tale turned fable.
  Born Cinderella,
  I’ve become the evil stepsister.

  I don’t know how to turn,
  and I’d rather be a pumpkin.
  Curious, I tasted, and now I’m stuck,
  a cat slaughtered slowly
  by filthy, filthy secrets,
  starting from the tongue.

  Where is my savior?
  Someone to scream STOP!
  so that I would hear and be saved.
  At this point, abandonment
  feels like the answer.

  Crisis he said, intrigued.
  Then he said I bored him, and left,
  back to his condo,
  back to his upper east side pedigree,
  back to his single world of superiority,
  but he’s right.
  I’m bored and lost,
  at a crack before the crisis.

  STOP! I scream, for the love of God, STOP!
  But my ears are hazy too,
  and instead, I wrote a bad poem today.
  Me made of bad poetry.
  While my parents want me to be nonfiction,
  I’m still a fable
  and evil stepsisters never make it to the ending.

  • 8:34 pm
  • 3 Comments